What is Sally's favorite flavor ice cream? She can't eat ice cream, she's lacktose and tollerant.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock Knock who's there docter docter who??? YOU JUST SAID IT DUMBO!!!!!! lolololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down

A cat walks into a Chinese restaurant. It is then asked to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Yo momma is so poor when she went to the bank the teller was like " you have no money."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

thumb_up thumb_down -4

When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

So three Irish guys walk out of a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A black man logs on to facebook. He checks his news feed then logs off

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Josh is sooo great at blowing, xoxo Dylan Hodge.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

My spelling is horrible

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the Christian turns to the Atheist and says "If you don't believe in god you will go to hell." The Atheist replies "Your Mom doesn't believe in god." And then turns around to order another drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call an animal killed on the side of the road? A false accusation towards an inanimate object that has no other purpose then providing a safe and smooth ride for drives all around the world.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

y does byonce sing to the left? because black people have no rights

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the boy cry after baseball practice? He was molested by his coach.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops