Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

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Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

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A- 2 jews walk in a bar..what happed? B- they died 35 years later from skin cancer

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What do you call a black person flying an airplane? The pilot.

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A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

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What do you call a teenager who cant add? A Total Failure

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Q. Where's your nan???? A. In my closet

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What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

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One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

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A man walks into a bar. Of chocolate. Yummy!

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

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That awkward moment where all you want for Christmas is for your parents to get back together but then you realize that they died in a car crash

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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