To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

I once heard a funny joke, it was as funny as a funeral

What did bob say when he was told his beloved parents were dying? "oh"

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

Why did the black guy not like oreos? because he is a very health concious person and knowes that too much of a bad thing can make you fat.

Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

Apple hates Blackberry.

Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

woman's rights

Whats worse than a bee sting? -Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? -The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? -Three bee stings.

What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

Yes

What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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