What's brown and sticky? A black man's dick after raping you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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What follows 2 days of rain? Statistically more rain, but you'll have to check the weather report to be sure.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

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Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

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Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

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What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

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why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

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How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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Why don't birds cry when they get hurt, lose a loved one, or watch opera? How the f*** should I know.

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Denard Robinson

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Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

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What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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