What do you do when you find a black man rolling around on the ground? Stop laughing and reload.

What do you call a mouse having sex? A spouse.

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

Scenario - Two astronauts are kayaking down the Sahara dessert. Question - How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse? Answer - Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

what happened to the girl that didn't forward the threatening chain text to ten people? nothing.

whats brown and sticky? Doody

You idiot.

Why was the little boy sad? -Because he was on Fire.

Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

What's worse than missing your flight? 9/11

Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

CAOIMHIN JUST BE QUITE

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...