Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

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God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

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Why did Sally fall off the Empore State Building? Her mother threw a refrigerator at her. -BG

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

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Listen Nero, I understand now that this is your real name, actually I know where you live thanks to the good old phonebook... ...My order is fully based on respecting and treating all living beings equally and focusing on actually putting old notions such as Gods and superstition away in order to strengthen humankind`s belief in itself and others. As for Nerometal, well, that was one of my... Lesser followers, I assure you they have been taken care off, they will not be bothering you ever again. What would it take for you to forgive our transgressions? Money? Power? Ask and you shall receive, as far as your identity goes, you shall have it back and I shall use another site in the future.

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knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

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can you touch your toes? no

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How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

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Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

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A Gamer walks into the tavern, the bartender says to him, "just dont act like you control the place!"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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Hej Erik och Leo!!

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Q: why does the man like men? A: because he is gay

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This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

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Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

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Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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