A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

what did hayley say to missy last night? I'm tired bye

your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

im typing this without looking at the jetviard. I can;t toycg type thar wekk yet

There is an American, a Mexican, and a Muslim on a plane They give the American the 1 parachute and the Mexican and the north koreon explode

give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

Why did the prostitute begin to cry when she saw the chinese patron's penis? His testicles are diced onions.

Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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