You know what makes jokes funny? Irony You know what makes anti-jokes funny? Common sense

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Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

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What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

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a man walks into a bar, what does he say answer: oww..

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Person 1: Happy Halloween! Person 2: Hey, I'm Jewish

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my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

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Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He didn't believe in santa.

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Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

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roses are red, violets are blue, get on your knees ho, and stick to me like glue.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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it was 3 am in the morning and i was stopped by 2 black men in an alley. we said hey to eachother and went along

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Diana- hey i havnt seen you all summer. Whaaat did you do over the summer? Paul- contract HIV Diana- ...oh ...

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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