Knock knock. Who's there? Me. Oh.

Why was this German dude's water bill so high this month? Because there were thirty dead Jews in his shower. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

Q. Why did the blonde die drinking milk? A. she was shot in the head by a 22.

roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

roses are red violets are blue i have some cheese im going to eat it

Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

No

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

What did the talking muffin say to the other talking muffin? Ah! A talking muffin!

Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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