Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

bangers and mash?

Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

roses are black violets are black i am blind

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

GOODBYE

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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