What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

Knock Knock? Whos there? akward neighbor. akward neighbor who?

Roses are red, Violet are blue. I just thought I'd let you know, But don't worry- this isn't a poem.

im jewish

How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

3 black men walk into a bar. They order their drinks, tip the bartender, and could not have been more courteous.

A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

Why did the girl fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms.

milly, milly, milly, cat

-What do you get when you graph the division of x by the square root of 69? - I don't know, what? -I was asking you, as my family's low economic status hinders my ability to buy a graphing calculator.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

Wana hear something dirty? Mud

Women rights.

why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, you tell me.

-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? You don't, Pikachu is a fictional character therefore doesn't exist

What did the boy get from Penn State University? A College Degree

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? seeing this joke 1000 times on this website

What's worse than losing your job? Getting brutally sodimized and murdered by a serial rapist.

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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