How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

your mamas so fat she falls out f both sides of the bed

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down +41

a woman asked her husband, why havent you been talking to me? the man answers, you are having an affair so i ignored you and only talked to the girl im cheating on you with. you should know your a horrible person

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your worst nightmare!! Ohh.... Do come in it's raining outside.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did Hitler cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Black people are innocent.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

For as long as i can remember, i've had memories

thumb_up thumb_down +33

nathan palmer has a big head !

thumb_up thumb_down +33

what do you call someone that is dying of malaria? someone that should consider visiting a doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did Hitler cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways. Only after practicing proper safety procedure did he venture across the busy thoroughfare to retrieve his asthma medication from his car.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the twin towers get at the pizza place? 2 planes

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

there are two hicks named Billy Bob and Joe. Billy Bob decides to go to college so he goes to sign up for classes. The Dean of the school decides to help him out and tells him he will be taking math, writing, and logic. Billy Bob is okay with the math and writing but then asks "what the hell is logic?" The Dean thinks for a moment and then says "Okay for example, do you have a weedwacker?" Billy Bob says "yeah i got a weed wacker" so then Dean says "So that probably means you have a yard." Billy Bob goes "yeah i got a yard" So the Dean says "so if youve got a yard you've probably got a house." Billy Bob goes "hell ya i got a house!" The Dean says "and if youve got a house that probably means you've got a wife." Billy Bob goes "ya! i got a wife" so the Dean says "If you have a wife then that means you are heterosexual" and Billy Bob goes "of course im heterosexual!" So the Dean goes "See Billy Bob, thats logic." Amazed by this, Billy Bob goes back to Joe and starts to tell him about his classes. He explains he will be taking math, writing and logic. Joe is confused so he asked Billy Bob "what the hell is logic!?" Billy Bob thinks for a moment and goes "okay how can i explain this....okay joe, do you have a weed wacker?" and Joe responds "no Billy Bob i dont got a week wacker..." Billy Bob: "I KNEW YOU WAS A HOMOSEXUAL!"

thumb_up thumb_down +31

what do you call a black priest? holy shit!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How do you win a war? Drop a fridge on your enemies.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Your life That's the joke

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why do redheads have red hair Because they were born like that.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a racist guy surrounded by a gang of black pepole? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops