How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator? Open the door and let him in. How do you put a giraffe in the refrigerator? Open the door and let the elephant out then give the giraffe a reasonable amount of time to enter.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +58

what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Your mom is so fat that it's becoming a serious health concern...

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

You're pretty... PRETTY UGLY

thumb_up thumb_down +50

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "For Christ's sakes, Grandma, put your pants back on!"

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

whats worse than the holocaust??? finding it in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the little boy find when he came home from school? His mother hanging from a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? The mexican, the black man broke his arm and the mexican is driving him to the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Shes dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Yo' mama so stupid, she has a lower IQ than the average person.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

thumb_up thumb_down +36

8=>

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why did man push another man off of a building? Because he is a homocidal maniac and should be in federal prison

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops