Why did the hooker go to the bathroom? Because she just exchanged sex for money and was cleaning herself up for her next trick.

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What did the boy say after he hit his head? I just hit my head.

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what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

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Hello

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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How do you know when a Mexican has died? Well based on the large mass of people inside and outside the funeral home who mostly seem to be of a mexican background and cultue, it would be safe to say that those are his/her friends and family who care deeply about them and therefore you could conclude that a Mexican person probably passed away. It's actually quite sad and going to be a rough few days for those closely connected to the person who died.

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Your Momma's so fat when the whales see her they don't say anything as they are unable to speak the human language.

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he overslept and missed a job interview and a chance to support his family.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red Fences are red OMG MY FENCE IS ON FIRE!

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Why are we posting shit jokes on here? Because we can't drink!

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What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

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The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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What do you call a group of asians? China.

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cheese

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How can you tell if a duck is watching you? Look at its eyes

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Whats the differance between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick into a chicks ass.

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What do you call a jew in a room full of gold? I highly improbable scenario in which the circumstances of how this "man" seemingly got into a gold room are unexplained.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Don't you hate it when you're reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles. _._._

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What does Paris Hilton eat on Tuesdays? Nothing.

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What do you call a person trying to save his interprise from partaking in a financial collapse by binging on alcohal? An alcoholic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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