A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Commie. Commie who? Commie Johnson. We went to high school together.

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a black guy and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? a taxi driver.

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Chocolate tastes good.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, and have a stimulating discussion about economics

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How do you check that you are not dreaming, but in actual fact, you are wide awake? Try to bite off our finger (this is actually possible, but the brain does not allow you to do it).

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What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Joseph Kony. Give me your children.

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Roses are read Violets are not green Chicken is good KFC baby, time to get lean

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A man from florida and a woman from florida go to a restaurant, which isnt very popular.

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what is white and sticky? glue.

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knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

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For as long as i can remember, i've had memories

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Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

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nbjhfghl

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nathan palmer has a big head !

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinson's Disease which causes his hands to shake uncontrollably thus making drawing anything relatively difficult and a perfect circle impossible.

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A farmer goes out to the coop to feed the chickens. They're all dead.

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What do you call someone who's black? A person you asshole.

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Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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