I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

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Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

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q: whats fat hairy and always eats mcdonalds a playboy model i lied about everything

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One drunk bug looks over to another drunk bug and guess what it says? Your a glitch

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A farmer goes out to the coop to feed the chickens. They're all dead.

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A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

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What's the difference between blacks and whites? The skin color

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How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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What what In the butt

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Once upon a time there was beautiful princess, ONCE!

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Two people walk into a bar, the third one ducked.

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a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

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jgkbk,mn

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? You don't, Pikachu is a fictional character therefore doesn't exist

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Knock knock! Who's there? Fed-Ex. We have a package for you.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender says, "Why the long face?" and the horse says, "I have cancer."

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Yo mama so fat even Dora couldn't explore her!

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How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

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What's 9 +10 19

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GRAAAAAAAR.

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What do you do when you come to a fork in the road? You take it

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What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

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How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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