Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up

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So I walked upstairs and I told the guy, "No." And he then asks, "Why?"

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-Why did Sara fall off the swing? -I don't know, why? -She had no arms, knock knock -Who's there? -Not Sara.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

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A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Commie. Commie who? Commie Johnson. We went to high school together.

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A black guy walks in to a bar.

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What's the best part about Africa? Nothing.

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nbjhfghl

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

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What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

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im jewish

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A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

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yo mamma so fat she seen a yellow train full of white people and she said stop that twinkie

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What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

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Why did Hitler cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways. Only after practicing proper safety procedure did he venture across the busy thoroughfare to retrieve his asthma medication from his car.

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Q: What is worse than loosing your arms? A: Dying

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Q: Why did the boy cry? A: He was denied access into heaven

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How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

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So Mel Gibson walks into a bar, and then everyone left.

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

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What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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