What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

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Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

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Why is Apple so successful? Well, that is not a question that can be answered simply. Many factors are involved in this, including but not limited to marketing, customer support, and smart business strategy. For more information, please visit Apple's website.

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Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

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What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

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fhfhfjjil;tyjgfkileg ryj ftrgndfhuiltyjgn

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An irishman walks into a bar and stays there until he goes home.

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

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Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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One day Rebecca Black was driving down the street in a brand new convertible Luckily a policeman pulled her over after observing that she was far too young to be driving a car. Underage driving is a serious offense and should not be endorsed in music videos.

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Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

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You just made me realize something friend, and for that I am grateful, I quit and left the remains of what could have been put together again, I mean if the chance was there, I betrayed both you and myself by leaving a sinking ship. I keep telling myself that our dream has no chance of becoming real in a world where people lack what we consider vision, individuality. Now I realize that by losing faith in humanity accepting their individuality and becoming an author of fiction, I have indeed lost my own belief in a greater world, this of course being reflected upon the fact that I write fiction, rather than speeches and well, what I once considered wisdom. Its just that its lonely at the top, the wiser you become, the more alienated you become from the rest, and if others no longer grasp our concepts of wisdom, strength honor, love and such.. Then I suppose that we just end up lonely, as aliens in a world full of monkeys, until I have begun questioning myself if I am just an arrogant prick, and taken that for an answer. Then it does not matter if you have one follower or a million... ...The sensation of solitude, becomes overwhelming, I guess I have been looking around the world for a definition, rather than following my own heart. Listen, I wont pretend to be you, but I will gladly join you, but if you cannot accept us as equals, I decline. Hey on the brighter side, I always got a "man that likes men" vibe out of you, I suppose I got myself a fan huh? Someone trying to copycat me. Damn, I feel broken, or maybe I just realized how broken I have allowed myself to become, lets say you are not really a woman and where using this in order to break me. Then I gotta say you got me there, and I am not proud of that, I guess that you trying, where I gave up, makes you the better one regardless.

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Micheal Curran...that is all.

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Someone offers your friend one of two things he say's "choose witch one you want" your friends asks you and you say "if i were you, i'd be ugly"

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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What happened when the Irish ran out of potatoes? Millions starved.

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Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

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What goes round and knocks on windows? A paedophile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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