whats long, orange, and comes out of brown stuff? -a carrot.

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What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

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What did billy get after sex? Herpes

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How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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woman's rights

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Yo mama so fat when she goes to the gym, she makes her trainer skinnier.

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What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Whats grey and kills people, Terminal cancer,I lied about the grey color

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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What's black and sits at the top of the stair case? Stephen hawking in a house fire.......

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What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

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Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

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Why did the plane to New York not land? It was redirected to Boston because of inclement weather.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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