No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

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Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got hit y a car

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chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

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why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because he was tired of the publicity his friend, the chicken was getting for crossing the road that he wanted to do it himself. Halfway across the duck was wistfully hit by a car and sadly, his story is lesser known and 99% of the people in this world really don't care about him. Thumbs up if you're that 1% that shows sympathy toward the duck.

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Why did Michael Phelps drown? He didn't because he is the best swimmer in olympic history.

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Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

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A coyote walks into a bar, because human development has rapidly destroyed his natural habitat. He mauls three patrons.

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Some of these jokes are funny, others are sad.

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In the movie "Sherlock Holmes". Why is Sherlock Holmes gay???? Because he was chasing "Blackwood".

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Don't you hate it when you have 5 dead bodies, and you don't know which one to shoot your load on? -no

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Why did the little girl have grass stains on her white dress? Because she was dragged into the forest and raped.

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What did the Rose Bowl say to the Fiesta Bowl? We crushed the Orange Bowl.

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How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

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why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

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Whats green and miss centowski hates a gas chamber :D lets be friends

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

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Cancer

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What do you call a black man running really fast down a street? Active.

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What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

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what did the hobo as the other hobo? do u have any cheese?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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