Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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What succeeds most of the time? The population of a field with grass.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. At what point would a chicken consciously know it was crossing a road.

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guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

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What's Blue And Fat? A Brick. I like to lie a lot.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

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-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

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A depressed man walks into a bar. He has a drink and heads back to his apartment. On the way he was killed by another man attempting to commit suicide due to depression.

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When Chuck Norris plays Modern Warfare 2, he gets more care packages than Haiti did.

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

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Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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Guess what? What. This joke isn't funny

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

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A circus clown climbs to the top of a five-storey ladder and dives into a foot-deep pool of water below. His neck is broken on impact. RIP Chuckles.

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why did marybeth fall off the swing i shot her in the fart box and she died

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What did the water bottle say to the Itunes gift card Nothing,they're both innament object and don't have mouths.

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Yo mommas so dumb she took an IQ test and scored low on it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops