what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was this German dude's water bill so high this month? Because there were thirty dead Jews in his shower. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally. Why did Sally fall of the swings? She had no arms. Why didn't Jimmy help her up? Jimmy is a fish. There's a guy with no arms and no legs who loves to swim. What's his name? Bob. Ya know Bob's twin brother is in the same condition. He loves to play in the leaves. And what's his name? Russell. Why couldn't Sally swing on the swing? She had no arms. What did the girls mom tell her to do before she went to bed? Go to bed. How do you wake up Will Ferrell? You set his alarm clock to a reasonable hour. What did the fat man who had his car stolen tell the police? Someone stole my car.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Factors that can increase your risk of prostate cancer include: Older age Being black Family history of prostate cancer Obesity My friend's grandfather is black and obese, his 70th birthday is tomorrow and his dad died of prostate cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -13

There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

You know what's sad and Funny? When a guy walks into a gay bar and doesn't get hit on.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Obviously more than six because my bass meant is still dark.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Last week, one of my ex girlfriends called me. She said she had to tell me some bad news. "I don't know how to tell you this but I have AIDS. I really didn't know how to reply to that so I said the only thing I could say. "Yeah, I know."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

whats the difference between a boyscout and a jew? boyscouts come home from camp

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, cause they are walls.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Tulips are brown, I need to stop working on my flower garden after fisting a cows butthole.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

B=boy G=girl B:hey i got a good nock nock joke but you have to start it G:okay nock nock B:whos there?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Yo mama's so stupid, she put the baby in the microwave

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What was a hard time for people? the great depression

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops