What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

Albino African Americans

what did the man say to the other man he bumped into? sorry. and they never saw eachother again

Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

The Walmart Scooterwhale (Terracetus obesitus) is the only member of the cetacean family to live in a terrestrial environment. Commonly found in large-scale grocery stores all across North America, it subsists mostly on fattening junk food, microwave popcorn, and beer.

Justin beiber comment if u get it

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

what did the man say to the doctor? how the hell would i know, ask him yourself.

A: Knock Knock (waits for an answer) oh there's no one in.

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

what do you call a black chef glendon

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...