A man is walking on the beach and discovers a lamp in the sand. He takes it home to polish it. Eventually it looks like new and he gets a fairly reasonable price from an antique shop.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

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why didn't Lebron James give me a fourth quarter?...he forgot his wallet at home and didn't have any spare change.

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what did the apple say to the orange, nothing fruits can't talk

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

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Yo Mama's so fat that she is at risk for diabetes

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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What did Larry do when little Billys baseball crashed through his window? He raped and murdered little Billy for Larry has raped and murdered many children.

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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Did you know there was a black man in my family tree? He married my aunt.

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

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I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

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A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops