Do you know what one golf ball said to the other? Nothing they are lifeless objects

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What did Ben's Graandma get him for Christmas? Nothing, she died on Thanksgiving!

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What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

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What's funnier than 24? 9/11

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why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

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Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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what did the white guy say to the black guy at the homeless shelter? Hi.

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YOU-why did the airplane crash? (person): why? YOU-Because jimmy was flying it. (person): Who is jimmy? YOU- a fish.

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How many Santa Clauses does it take to change a light bulb? Santa Claus isn't real.

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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There are no stupid Questions just stupid people

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink Bartender: Why the long face Man: My wife was recently killed in a horrible car accident Bartender: Oh my god, I'm so sorry Man: Jks I have AIDS

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Unfortunate

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

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Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

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Want to hear the World's shortest joke? Peace. [L]

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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