A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

When life hands me beef, I make lemon stew.

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

A van drives into a car.

Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

A baby crawls into a bar. He cannot walk.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

What does mickee say to other animals. Mouse

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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