Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Because 6 was registered as a sex offender

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? We are both dinosaurs.

Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

69 :) 3====D:). [{}]:)

What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the other kids at recess? I chopped her legs off.

If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

white or wheat? wheat please.

My mom

A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area. He stops for lunch and heads home.

God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

Turkey Balls

Read a Book.

Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

You know whats annoying? Steve

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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