why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

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What's sad about Justin bieber getting thrown off of a cliff Nothing

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Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

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What did the man give his wife for her anniversary? Nothing. The man is a raging alcoholic and forget her anniversary due to his high alcoholic intake during the past few weeks. Even if he did remember he most likely didn't care after seeing his wife cheat on him with another woman putting his marriage into shambles.

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What did the American man say to his brother right before his brother's wedding? You should not get married because most likely your marriage will end in a horrible divorice, which will ruin the rest of your pathetic life.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

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Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

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A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

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How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

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What did the boy skip rocks with? -A rock

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

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What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

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How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

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Why did the plane to New York not land? It was redirected to Boston because of inclement weather.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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