How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

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What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

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Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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Why does a clown wear makeup? So you can't identify him to police after he shoves your kids in his tiny car and drives away.

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What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

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why does the man appear fat he is

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How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

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A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops