What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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Q.A zebra somehow managed to get out of the zoo and started running all around the town. After some time he saw a zebra crossing(not an original zebra crossing the road but the black and white stripes)on the road.He stoppped suddenly.WHY? A. He was too tired to run any more!!!

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What's small, white, and it killed Bruce Lee? Aspirin.

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What's special about an Irish Parachute ? It's made in Ireland.

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Yo mamma so fat not even Dora can explore her

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How many TV shows are there? A lot.

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What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

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Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

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What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

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what's black and white and red all over? a zebra in a blender

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

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Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

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Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunett: i don't know Blonde: NOBODY KNOWS!!!

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

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Why was the blonde confused? Because someone was dressed in a chicken costume throwing pinecones at her.

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Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

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I'm homeless.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he is quite wealthy.

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Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

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why'd the Chinese kid die how the hell should i now

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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