Did you hear why the peanut got arrested by walking next to another peanut? One got a-salt-ed

Q: What's the difference between Catholism and Judiasm? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

What did the Jewish man get for his birthday? Pork.

a person who will soon die of beeties

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone...

Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

whats the difference between an orange and a dead baby? one is a tasty treat and the other is an orange

Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

whats the difference between a ladybug and a jew? there is none

What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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