How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

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What happened when the lawyer went surfing? A shark came up and tore his leg off.

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Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

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Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

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What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

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How do you make a sandwich? Go into the kitchen and make a sandwich.

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why did the monkey fall out of a tree?? a snail threw a refridgerator at him

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haha women's rights.....what a joke.

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Q:What happens when a bug walks into a bar A:It gets stepped on

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

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Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

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What do you call a Serbian-Australian man with no arms, no legs, and two feet. Nick Vujicic

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YODO (unless you're religious background encourage you to believe in an afterlife of some sort, be it of animalia or homo sapien decent.

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whats brown and has wings? a stick, i lied about the wings bit

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Why does Hilter hate Jews? He's incapable of hating because he's dead.

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What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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Why isn't Pluto a planet? Because it mutilated my dog

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RUN

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

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Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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