Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

Why did the boy's house get destroyed? It was bombed.

Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

What did lil' Bobby get for christmas? Cancer.

Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

Why didn't Tyron run from the police? He had no legs.

You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

what's worse than pie? alot of things.

A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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