what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

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What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree!" "Are you a tree?" "No."

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A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

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Hey girl, do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I dropped one and I can't find it.

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What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

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Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He orders a beer with two cubes of ice. The bartender ask why does he want two cubes of ice. The guy doesn't answer. He finishes his beer and proceeds to go home safely because he was not intoxicated.

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Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike.

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My brother is crazy... crazy like a fox! I caught him eating a Possum on the side of the road yesterday.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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An old man walks into a grocery store, but doesn't come out. What happened? A plane crashed into the grocery store, killing everyone inside.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Certainly not to have its motives questioned!

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How can you finally get your girlfriend to scream in the bedroom? Store the bodies there.

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What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

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Man 1: Did you hear that one about that girl who killed herself? Man 2: No Man 3: Yeah, neither did I

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A man driving through a thunderstorm said, "look, it's rain, dear." His wife, being a reindeer, took offense to that statement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops