A sign at the drug rehab centre said keep off the grass. Jimmy thought it was a joke. So the groundskeeper chopped his legs off.

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What's sad about 3 black people going over a cliff in a Cadillac? Cadillac's seat 6

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

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A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

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I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

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Why was it cold in Florida on Monday? Because there was an irregular cold front moving through. The Monday part was just a coincidence.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This website is dumb Your mom is going to kill you

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-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

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why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

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How to you kill a pizza guy? Shoot him in the face.

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What did the snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?

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What's an example of something quiet? Helen Keller.

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I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

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What's brown and sticky? A lump of shit.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

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Weaner

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

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Why was the woman so hot? she was on fire

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

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How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops