An Italian man with a very thick accent decides to travel to America. On arriving, he decides to take a taxi and tour the nearby city. The man, feeling hungry after a while, chooses to stop at a bakery. Upon entering the bakery, the man walks up to the display of bread, and points at the loaves of bread he wanted, calling to the baker "I want 2 piece." The baker, not understanding the man's accent asks the man to repeat what he said. So the man repeats, "I want 2 piece, right here, right now." "Sure thing," the baker says, and gives the man the loaves of bread.

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Why didn't the tv turn on? It wasn't plugged in

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News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

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I don't want to hear another joke about female hygiene, PERIOD! -Lets go Mets

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why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Holocast ...

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Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

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Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

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What do you call a moldy apple? ... A moldy apple.

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I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

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Why was 95 lb jack able to chug so fast? Because he is a diabetic

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There were 50 koreans; half of them liked gangnam style but the other half didn't. Why didn't the other half like gangnam style? They were north koreans.

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What do you call 10 black people swimming down a current? A happy family

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There were three people on an airplane. A Mexican, an American and an Italian. The plane chrashed and they all died.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in an apple? Rape and child abuse.

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An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

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I haven't read and I don't agree to the Terms of Service

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Q:What's black, wrinkled and smells like raisins? A: A raisin.

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A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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When geese fly in the V formation why is there always one side longer than the other? Because theres more geese on that side.

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A man came home and witnessed his wife having an affair with another man. The husband and wife got into a huge argument and eventually got divorced

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What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

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Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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