knock knock, whos there? the bum bum boys ready to dance :) ``~ ``sms

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three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

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An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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Why were Billy's parents laughing at him? Because he was just diagnosed with cancer!

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welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

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What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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Q.sam is 18 years old, why can't she get her licence? A.because Sam is a lost dog on the street

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The Pterodactyl species became extinct 65 million years ago, and thus if you saw one today, you would be immediately taken into a mental hospital.

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What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? The Holacoast

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops