Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

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If you listen to Justin Beiber all day long, what do you become? Very hungry and thirsty. And you need to go to the restroom.

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What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

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What do you call a person who kills there own child? Casey Anthony.

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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why did the guy round second base? to get to 3rd

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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What's worse than getting raped? getting raped by a horse in car while listening to nickelback

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I'm going to Re-write History... History

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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Chris is hairy

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

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Why couldnt hellen keller drive because she was a women

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whats long, orange, and comes out of brown stuff? -a carrot.

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How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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What did the mexican say to the black guy? He asked if he needed some drugs. Why? He was a pharmacist.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

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A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops