A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

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Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

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How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

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What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

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What's worse than finding out your friend is gay? Being gang-raped.

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Wath black poeple eat for christmas your food.

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Don't you hate when you finger your belly button and your nipples exploed?

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What is worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? The holocaust.

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Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

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What did the mexican say to the black guy? He asked if he needed some drugs. Why? He was a pharmacist.

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

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OK, so there's this blonde driving down the road in her brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 Lamborghini. She's cruising at about 95, radio blaring, having a great time. She comes up on this trucker who is carrying a double-wide home and is taking up both lanes. To her disliking, he is only going about 45. To get the point across that she wants to get past, she decides to tailgate him. So, she gets to within a foot of his rear bumper. The trucker looks back and sees her on his ass, and motions for her to get off of it, but to her it looks like a wave and she waves back. Since her first attempt was futile, she decided to get a little closer and begin flashing her headlights, hopefully making herself more visible in the process. Once again the trucker sees her on his ass, and this time motions for her to pull over to the side of the road. The trucker steps out of his vehicle with a chunk of chalk and draws a circle three feet in diameter in the middle of the road. He instructs her not to move until he tells her to. Naive as she was, she agrees to it and steps inside it. The trucker goes back to his truck and pulls out a 50-ounce Louisville Slugger. He walks over to the Lamborghini and beats it, and beats it, and beats it again. When he is done, all that is left is a brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 pile of metal. Satisfied, he throws the bat in his truck and walks over to the blonde. When he gets there, to his astonishment, the cops were waiting. He was found guilty in court and forced to pay the blonde a settlement of $250, 000.

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Two muffins are in an oven one muffin says to the other muffin "It's hot in here" the other muffin says "Holy crap a talking muffin".

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A Duck, a Mexican guy and Helen Keller walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What do each of you want?" The duck doesn't respond because is is a duck. The Mexican guy doesn't respond because he doesn't know English that well. Helen Keller does't respond because she is dead.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

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A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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Chris is hairy

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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