What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

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A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

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My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

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A man is boarding a plane. The attendant asks if he has a passport. The man says no, and leaves.

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What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

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Three ethnic minorities walk into a bar, and each does something involving alcohol that confirms a negative stereotype about his subgroup.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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What do you call a black man carrying a T.V? Someone that is helping me move.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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