What do you call a person without any arm no legs and a eye patch? names

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OMG my mom just let me go to a concert in feb 31,2012 wohoo! LOL

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whats sad about justin bieber getting hit by a car and dying ? I wasnt driving the car that hit him.

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Hey, you why you say poo poo nae nae watch me whip, and do the dougie, and then happy halloween? Potato Salad

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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Why did the dog lick the boy's leg? Cause when the boy blew up his leg landed in the doghouse

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Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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Why did the elephant get on the roof? To jump in the pool.

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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whats red round and gets smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potatoe peeler

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A depressed horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "Millions of years of natural selection." The horse then tries to drink away his sorrows, but the alcohol is only a temporary release from the pain he's feeling. He kills himself the next day.

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there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

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Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

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whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

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He who laughs last gathers no moss.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

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My cat just died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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