What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, And really aggravate my allergies.

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Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: None. Woodchucks do not have opposable thumbs and cannot grasp or throw anything, so the point is moot unless they evolve thumbs for the sole purpose of chucking wood.

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Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

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Whose your daddy? Not me

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

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Why did I deleted brian from my friend list ? Cuz he had brain tumor.

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Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

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What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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A white guy a black guy and a mexican are in a car and the car crashes and blowes up who dies? They all die cuz they all were in the car when it blew up

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What did the gym coach tell his student? Come on! You can do it! Push harder!

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

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An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

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Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

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Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

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a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

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Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

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What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? there are twenty of them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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