Knock knock Fuck off!

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

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Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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A bus with 12 black guys is driven off a cliff. What is the sad part of this story? ... Our beloved president was not involved.

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oh hai i'm al gore reduce ur carbon footprint lolz

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A blonde, a red head, and a brunette are on an island. Due to the law of averages, this isn't that unlikely or significant.

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What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

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Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

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What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

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Im sitting in class trying to write a joke. I should be writing my speech But i'm better off trying to think of the funniest joke that could get on the front page with over 9000 likes :( Lol nah thats never going to happen :'(

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i think dylan is turnimg gay for amy

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I have magical powers. Try your best to not to follow these instructions: Ready? Go. You are now blinking your eyes. (strike 1) You are now breathing voluntary. (strike 2) You suddenly have an itch somewhere on your body. (strike 3) You lost. Thanks for playing my little game. Hope you enjoy thinking of a flying pink elephant with wings.

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whats worse than one bee sting? two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings? the halocaust whats worse than the halocaust? three bee stings

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What's read,bubbly and looks out the window? A baby in a microwave

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

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How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

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What did the mom say to her daughter? I love you.

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Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

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how do i know if my husband is cheating? beat him until he tells you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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