If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock. Who's there? Mom. Mom who? SHUT THE F**K UP AND OPEN THE DOOR!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Barbara and Martin died in their apartment. The neighbor walked in and found glass and water everywhere. How did they die? -Barbara and Martin were fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a black guy driving an airplane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says we dont sell juice here. The jew promptly leaves, offended.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man walks into a bar. Splash.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

"I'm so hungry!" "Hello so hungry, I am Matt. You must come from a very odd family if your name is " so hungry"!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q:If quizes are, "guizicles," then what are tests? A:Who calls quizes, "quizicles?"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

yo mamas so young shes gonna b born soon

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops