Why couldn't the Muslim eat pork? He didn't have a tongue.

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What's green and invisible? Nothing; green and all other colours of the rainbow have wavelengths that occur specifically in the visible range of the electromagnetic spectrum. Therefore any invisible object cannot be green.

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You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

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Yo mama so dirty when she takes baths there are rings.

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings. Now hats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Three bee stings.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

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knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

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Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

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How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

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"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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What's 6 inches long and 2 inches wide and can drive a woman crazy? Money

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

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What did the famer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?!?!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

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Tim: Ya know what was wondering? Paul: What? Tim: Actually, I'm not wondering about it anymore.

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What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

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Burp

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America's Got Talent WIN! Britian's Got Talent WIN! Mexico's Got Talent WTF!

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Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops