What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A dead baby causes years of grief and broken families

What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

Why did the plane full of Arabs crash? One of The engines failed

Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Police, your family just died in a car accident/

A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

Two people walk into a bar, the third one ducked.

Roses are brown. Violets are brown. It's the middle of winter. Flowers look like poop.

Small breasts.

Noah is Smart.

A boy with red hair is happy.

A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

What's worse than seeing your goldfish die? Watching your grandfather have a stroke.

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

Yo mama so fat even Dora couldn't explore her!

What's worse than going to boot camp? - going to concentration camp.

Two men are talking at a bar. They both order the same drink but are charged different prices. Angered, one of them men confronts the bartender. A fight breaks out and the bartender is seriously injured.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

Knock, knock. Who's there? New Kids on the Block. Wait, who?

Why is Santa's sack so big? His doctor recently diagnosed him with testicular cancer.

roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

Why couldn't the boy sing? The boy could sing, but the thick layer of duct tape prevented him from doing so.

What did the man say to hitler? hi hitler.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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