the cow goes moo

Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? You don't, Pikachu is a fictional character therefore doesn't exist

How do you win a war? Drop a fridge on your enemies.

i am an idiot if you read this outloud your a dumb ass

What is green, ugly and can't empty his bowels without exerting a tremendous amount of energy? A constipated, ugly, green thing.

What did the man say to his wife before they went to bed? Goodnight.

How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? Well, one consists of two inanimate objects (a bucket and feces) and the other is a human being of African/African-American descent. As you can see there really is no real comparison here.

What do you do when you come to a fork in the road? You take it

A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

What did the Muslim do when he was in a big American crowd? He was socializing.

why was the bunny black? because it was born this way baby

Why are video games fun? To get a mushy brain :P

What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

What did the mother give her family for christmas? Nothing. The family is Jewish.

What do yo call SQUIRAL!!!!

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven beats his wife.

Ya well your momma's so hot...I'd bang her

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

What did the man say to the atractive woman? Hi

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven.

What did I say when I fell of THEEeEeeeeeeee...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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