What did the mother give her family for christmas? Nothing. The family is Jewish.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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This is not Will Smith.

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Once upon a time, there was boy. I saw this boy. So I sat on him.

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is too sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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Matt swam through watter. Gaby drowned on dry land.

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What did the American call the Arab? Nothing the American could not talk because he suffered from throat cancer because of the effects of 9/11 and thus causing his hatred towards Arabs and led to the Arabs death. Green

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Your Momma's so fat when the whales see her they don't say anything as they are unable to speak the human language.

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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A blind woman walks into a bar... she stands there confused because she is blind and can't tell what going on.

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What is worse but similar to Jenga? The September 11th attacks.

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Knock knock Nobody's home.

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What do you call a black person in a pool? A black person swimming.

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One day three men died. Heaven had almost been full, and he wanted to see who could get in and who would burn. So the first man starts and says "well I just got home from my girlfriends house, she just dumped me. I was crazy mad, and as I was about to eat the pain away, I saw a man hanging off of my porch. I ran to the man pulled out a sledge hammer, and then smashed his hands off the balcony. And without thinking I picked up my refrigerator and threw it down at him. But sadly I fell with the refridgerator." the second man steps up and says.. "I was doing my dance routine on my porch, and I slipped on an ice cube and flipped off the rail. I took ahold of a railing on which I could puulmupmtomsaftey on, but as I was about to save my own life some psychotic man comes out with a sledge hammer and bashes my hands off the railing. After he threw his refridgerator down at me." and then the third guy says..."well I was in this refridgerator........."

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An attractive naked woman walks into a bar. Everyone is surprised, and all the straight men, gay women and bi-sexual men and women in the bar are sexually aroused.

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What do you call a naked black person? A black guy

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This joke isnt funny.

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Jasper sucks.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it was born yesterday.

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How did two Jews react when they saw a quarter on the sidewalk? They agreed to donate it to charity.

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Jack Oliver has a Bowl.

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What smells worse than an old women's fart? the rotting carcus of a dead baby

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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