Why was the grandomther crying? She just got pepper sprayed.

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Two scuba divers are playing cards on the bottom of the ocean. One asks "have you got amy threes?" Then they both die from maintained exposure to the incredible pressure at the bottom of the sea. One left behind three children.

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Ask me if im a truck. Are you a truck? Yes.

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did you know that zach is the coolest person ever? no? well now you know

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Roses are red, pink, white or yellow. Stop stereotyping my arrogant fellow.

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A man works at a Doritos factory hes worked there for a few weeks and hes made the most Doritos in his line now and the head of the company gives him a promotion he now runs his own line a few months later the head of the company bob comes back to him and promoted him again to now our friend Carl is head of the Factory about two years later bob comes to Carl and hes promoted to head of the east coast he is head of 27 Factories about a decade later bob asks Carl if when he retires Carl will take over the company and he accepts bobs offer 23 years pass and bob retires Carl is the new head of the company so he is about like 65 at this point and he wants some wine so him and his buddies go for some wine Dan says Carl this lines two long so they decide to have some soda and then Jason says this lines longer then the last one so Aiden says to Carl why don't we go get some punch so they all got into line but there was no punch line a.w. j.p.

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Lindsay Lohan

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? To visit the graves of his wife and only daughter who were killed in a car accident at the fault of a drunk driver many years prior.

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whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

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Men's rights

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How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

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Why did the white man buy a new pair of socks? His old ones has holes.

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Roses are red, Metal is gray, Justin Beiber, is very gay

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Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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