I gotta friend named Michael Nugyen and he dishonored his family. Did I mention he was asian ( he live in tampa fl )

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in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

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Girl 1- why was 6 afraid of 7? dog- ..................................(doesn't say anything because dogs can't ruff)

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Why was the homosexual sad? Because his parents kicked him out, it was illegal for him to be married, and he had a difficult time being accepted by the society into which he was born.

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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A:how many notzies dose it change a light bulb B:none they made the jewish do it. :(

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Everyone text/call Mrs. Butt Hemingworth for a free pint of her delicious marmalade! Serious inquirers only. 832 704 1331

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Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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Q: What is the fastest way to get insulted? A: Go screw yourself m0therf0cker!

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Nothing. I killed them both with a fire axe and proceeded to kill all the patients in the hospital.

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A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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why did the kid drop his toy? a dog was ripping out his throat

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What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

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What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

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Why did the Mexican jump of the roof? Because he had a serious meth addiction that was destroying his family and he could not live with the awful things he did to get his fix.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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