How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

Every first letter of an innappropriate body part is how it actually looks like: Penis, Vagina, Boobs

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

what did the pornography filmer say to the asain man as he was having sex? im taking a highly pixelated recording of you and your partner engaging in sexual intercourse

How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? Hi!

John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

i have a black person in my family tree he's still hanginh

knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Someone threw a hippo at the pilot.

A:Whats the air speed velocity of a swallow? B:What an african or English swallow? A:Well I don't know that.

Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

I have a dirty joke. Yesterday I fell in the mud.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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