Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

Why did the man ask the woman on a date? They were both single and looking for a unique, romantic experience that could possibly turn into a long-term loving relationship.

The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

Uh... Justin, the most pointless man... I gotta cringe for a moment, I don't want to be mean here, but I think my body cell total opinion pool dropped a large quantity there, its not that I do not want you anymore, but, my body`s mass body cell total is kinda denying me... Actually I am denying IT... ACTUALLY WE ARE DENYING EACH OTHER, (which is totally awesome, united denial fighting against one another FOR DENYING THE MOST! BECAUSE COOPERATION IS FOR PUSSIES!) Anyway, hell I am dead tired, oh yeah, Justin... Man, Uh, who where you again?

Q. Why hasn't LeBron won a ring? A. Throughout his career, he has been placed with incapable teammates, thus leading to unsuccessful results. However, recently, he has been placed with individuals valid pod achieving such a goal.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got Alzheimer's, Who are you?

Q: What do you say when you see your T.V. floating at night? A: That's so frickin awesome

Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

if you can read this you dont' need glasses

hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

WHY DID THE MAN RUN A MILE?.BECAUSE HE WAS TRYING TO CATCH HIS NOSE AND GET A TISSUE

XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It depends on the person. To generalize and select one sport to represent the entire race would be stereotyping.

I gotta friend named Michael Nugyen and he dishonored his family. Did I mention he was asian ( he live in tampa fl )

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

Why couldn't the towel talk? Because it didn't have a language.

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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